I was on top of the world.....

It was on Friday morning January 29th that the call came in that took me off the top of my world, I was informed that I was being layed off from CMP. I don't think that I even heard all or heck even half of the conversation for I was in tears hysterical to say the least, I was LAYED OFF. I could not believe it, after the call that changed a lot of things was over Amber asked me what was wrong and I told her that CMP did not need mom anymore and that I had lost my job, I mean whats a seven year old to think she ran to me with open arms and hugged me "it will be OK mom" and that moment I grabbed my 2 week old and held her too and thought you are right it's OK now.
As I spread the news to the husband he was nothing more than supportive and right then and there our relationship changed for the better and forever.
Sometimes things happen in your life and it's a meant to be situtaion and I thought maybe I was meant to be a Stay at home mom of my two beautiful girls and if I had to give up many things then so be it.
When life gives you lemons you make meonade right.........

I went from being so sad and hurt to right pissed off that a company had to do this because people can't pay their dam CMP bills and puit a company into a collections company, I will miss the people that I have come so close with in only a two year time frame. Friends that were just like family when you spend 17 hour days with these people during storm you become one big family, I have shared so much with these people and made some awesome memories and I will not forget anyone of them, I will not be a stranger to them, I'm not gonna let this out of country greed interfer with my friends.
I'm a stronger woman than I ever thought possible..

How Time Flies

Well I just happened to open my blog to see that my last post was four months before my little one was due to arrive. Well today is February 3rd and she has arrived and our family is complete with another daughter. She arrived via c-section on January 7th 2010 (I like to say that she was evicted) She was born at 9:20 and weighed 7lbs 7oz and is 21 inches long she is a twin of her big sister and once again I fell in love with this little girl that has considered me her home for the last 9 months. As soon as I saw her and heard her cry I could not take my eyes off her, having had a c-section I had no choice to lay there but I saw it all and she was in the room with me untill about three minutes before I left to go to recovery. What a whole diffrent experince then 7 years ago with Amber, would I do it again yes but I'm all set with the beautiful family I have.

I could not wait for her sister to meet her and as soon as she walked in the room I was filled with emotion as I watched her fall in love with her too at that moment she saw her. What a blessing to be a mom of two beautiful girls and my life could not be better we are a complete family.

Lauren is now three weeks old and how each day as I cuddle her and nurse her she changes her facial expressions and I know she knows that I'm her mom. That is such a wonderul feeling, The best feeling in the world to be a mom of TWO GIRLS.

Well on our way!

Well my mom and dad said that they would buy the bedding for Lauren's room so off to NH they went last week to get the Willow Deer set I saw this and fell in love with it. Well that night we went over to see it and I just could not do it, it was too dark. The brown was a little overpowrering and that made it hard to look past even if we were to add pink to it. So that weekend we took a rode trip all of us. We had not done that in quite sometime but anyway, we ended up picking out a set by Carters Garden Party it's called with Lilac, Light brown, sage and some pink. I love it has such a girly feel to it and I think with a Lilac room it will look awesome. I'm really happy with it. Now the next thing to do clean out the room and get it ready.

Active Little One

Well, Miss Lauren Elizabeth is an active little one, oh yes her name is out. Not a secret and so far I have heard no complaints and you know what too bad if they don't like it. Well Amber had a special part in her name picking she got to pick out her middle name. I picked out Lauren and Amber had a choice of either Elizabeth or Elaine. Well she did not have to think too hard and she choose Elizabeth. It does flow really nice together but it would had been nice to have her have my middle name but thats ok I wanted Amber to have a part too. So she is much more active then Amber ever was or maybe I notice it more because I have a desk job who knows. I have been trying to get Amber to feel her kick and she has a hard time waiting or Lauren like to tric her cause as soon as she kicks I put Ambers hand on my belly and then she stops when Amber takes her hand off she kicks again. So one of these days we will catch her in the act. Amber loves to talk to my belly to her and I know how excited she is to meet her.

My daughter is a big 7 year old

Wow where has the time gone, Amber is getting so grown up and as I look back at all her pictures and see that baby face still in her, I don't see it now. She is beginning to get out of her baby face stage and move onto young child. She has grown quite a bit with everything she has a loving personality and I love that she is always full of life. She make me laugh all the time even when she can be sassy. She loves to be foolish and act silly.
This years big party event was going to be a dance party at the dance studio with her friends from school it was sure to be a big hit. The girls loved the dancing and trying out the many diffrent types of dance that thier is. Amber was in heaven for she has quite the passion for dance.
She had a great party and made memories with her friends I'm sure to last a lifetime.

The day has arrived

Well after a week of not sleeping well and trying not to worry the big ultrasound is here, I prayed that God was on our side. Well the morning seemed to drag by and then when 12:00 noon hit I could not get there fast enough, Amber was excited to finally find out what she was going to have, I had pretty much convinced her that she should not be set on a girl because it could also be a boy, so I thought I had done well with that. At about 1:30 we met with the genetic counselor and she was very nice and explained about what they were looking for and then the choices that we would have to make, I felt better but I also did not rest assured quite yet the butterflies in my stomach were going nuts and no it was not the baby. Well after we met with her we had to go back to the wait room to wait for a sonogram room to open about 20 minutes later the moment had arrived, I tried to relax the best I could. Amber watched in amazement as she put the gel on my belly Amber loves that part. Well it was not long before that little on showed on the screen back to us so it would not be an easy task to get the measurements but she did well even if that meant that I had to lay on my side for almost the whole time, well we got to see her perfectly and everything looked great. So far she asked us if we wanted to know the sex so the moment of truth was not far, I was nervous about her position but when she found the bum our little one was spread eagle and then the words it's a GIRL came out of the techs. mouth I could not believe it, I could had sworn it was a boy, well tears rolled down my face as I looked and saw Amber smiling from ear to ear she would have a little sister and I would be blessed with two daughters, Amber wondered why I was crying but the build up of emotions was just letting loose, but I gained my composure and watched as I thought a little girl what a blessing. We then waited for the Dr. to review the pictures and then the genetic counselor came in to give us a thumbs up to tell us that our little girl looked perfect. Thank you lord for answering our prayers.

The results

On Thursday August 13th I got a call from Dr. Sansonetti with the last part of my NT quad screen results and I had a positive test come back for 1:110 chance of Downs Syndrome, he told me not to stress but how do I not do that, he changed my ultrasound to the 20th so that they could do a level 2 ultrasound and meet with the gentic counsler so, I had all I could do was to cry and I knew that I could not stress. But easier said then done, we will pray and keep our fingers crossed and hope for a healthy baby.